The other day I made mention of the Bizzarro Universe in relation to General Hospital (and I don’t mean Night Shift). Well, its happened. Carly actually knocked on Logan’s door (one of two; whether it is the front or back door is debatable) and announced herself. This is Bizzarro for two reasons: a) Carly usually busts through the door and asks questions later and b) she introduced herself as “Carly Corinthos”, so either she is pretending to be me at a bar, enjoys the alliterative qualities of said name, or forgot that she married Jax several months ago.
In other news, Carly and Lulu continue to work in tandem, bitching people out left and right in Port Charles. I wish Laura was around (and not catatonic) to witness this. It’s one thing for Carly to call out Logan, but for Lulu to go ballistic on Jax is another matter entirely. But whereas people find Carly to be a pain in the ass, everyone still seems to love Lulu. Why? She’s not sweet or funny or particularly witty. She’s pretty, but so is Maxie and everyone treats her like the plague. At least Carly made some sense about confusing sexual relationships with emotional ones. Say what you will about Carly, but she’s been there and done that twice, so sometimes she’s allowed to make adequite points, whereas Lulu is maybe 19 years old and goes around giving marital advice to Jax. I find this amusing because she is basically telling Jax to stop trying to save his brother, while Lulu has spent her entire summer pleading with Jason to give up his rights to Baby Jake so her brother can be happy with Elizabeth. The hypocracy runs deep with this one.
Meanwhile, Jason is on a mission to avenge Spinelli. Really Jason? Is this how we’re trying to conceal our secret pain by getting into high school fights? At this point, Jason reminds me of the Matthew McConaughey character in Dazed and Confused, hanging out with people he is way older than and wearing inappropriately tight jeans.
Speaking of inappropriate clothing, enter: Samantha. I love how Sam strolls into Liz’s house wearing her best “Dickens’ street urchin meets Renaissance Faire wench” ensemble. I think there might have even been a tie in there for good measure. Anyway, Sam is all “Your husband works for me now” and Liz is like “I’m just sitting here ironing Lucky’s clothes because since I’ve been called out as an adultress, I spend my days doing household chores like laundry, cooking, and cleaning. Soon they’ll let me take this darn red ‘A’ off.”
Finally, Sonny whined about Kate to Jason who in turn whined to Sonny about Logan manhandling Spinelli. Since Sonny is King of the Playground, his hurt feelings about Kate liking his ex-stepfather more than him prevailed. I mean, if they’re going to force us to watch juvenile plots, then they should just focus the show on Morgan since he’s way more entertaining than most of these people.
[...] writer) while Jason walks around pensively, thinking only of the children, and Liz continues her redemption via domesticity by once again folding laundry and wearing her headband of repressed longing. So Lucky comes home [...]