John Black died, y’all. For a soap opera that stretched out countless, boring and pointless storylines, the funeral of a beloved character lasts an episode and a half? Do you remember how much time was spent on the Confederacy of Dunces involved in the Touch the Sky Airlines/Unnamed Vegas Casino on the Strip fiasco? Exactly.
What’s up with the pacing? How odd was it that midway through the show it suddenly became a new day? While the stuff with Belle and The Widow Evans Black was great, I didn’t get Bo and Shawn’s Race for the Cure (For Stupidity) down at the docks. Let me be perfectly honest, I haven’t liked the character of Shawn since he came back as a teen. Now that his transformation from beloved child to Unfrozen Caveman is complete, I hate him more. I am also really tired of the countless “but I wanna be a cop” pronouncements. Realistically the only career that I see Shawn exceeding at is Male Exotic Dancer, but that’s just me.
I mentioned Belle and The Widow Evans Black earlier, but I want to reinforce that they are really selling the grief. I would have been totally fine if it was just the two of them but then Goodwife Roberts has to pop in with her five year old-unborn twins and French pastries. The problem with this whole scenario is that Sami is the black sheep of the family and that’s why you root for her. I can’t deal with a Sami who thinks of Napoleon Complex Lucas as her hero, who vows to end the vendetta by marrying EJ, and who crawls in bed with her mother and sister. I know that people evolve and grow, but I just don’t find Sami interesting as a heroine. She’s a schemer and a scrapper. Maybe when she finally delivers, Dr. Michael Hudson (or whatever his name is) can simultaneously re-insert her spine.
