God love Tori Spelling but that was a painful 42 minutes of television. No matter how many old school characters come back this show is still awful. I don’t want to brag, but I feel like I wrote more realistic dialogue for my 5th Grade Variety Show.
I guess we should begin with the return of Ms. Martin. At this point in my life, I would much rather watch a sitdown interview with Candy and Tori moderated by Matt Lauer. Or just Tori selling her jewelry on a home shopping network and giving her thoughts on how her father’s legacy is now being subsidized by Dr. Pepper. Seriously, what is it with this show and the rich man’s Mr. Pibb? I know times are tough and product placement is a fact of life, but do they have to be so blatant about it? I half expected Liam to tell Ethan he’d switched his regular peyote-laced tea with Dr. Pepper and be done with it.
By the way, I liked Liam and Ethan’s bonding in the wilderness subplot the first time I saw it, fifteen years ago when Brandon almost fell to his death off a cliff and was saved by Dylan and his eyebrows. In fact, there were a few old school callbacks in this episode, like when Liam sexed up Naomi in the woods and neglected to bring a blanket. I’m sure Kelly would have something to say about that but she was too busy donning face masks and doling out sugar free cookies.
Speaking of Kelly, when did she get so lame? Remember how she didn’t know anything about Color Me Badd yet hung out with them unsupervised in a suite at the Bel Age Hotel? Now she’s fawning over Diablo Cody? True Confession: I didn’t love Juno and I found it too cutesy and self-consciously hip with hamburger phones and short gym shorts. But back to this nonsense: Kelly has lived in Beverly Hills her entire life so you’d think she’d be blase about celebrities. Then poor Donna’s like a deer in the headlights on the red carpet. Do you think she forgot that she was a teen model in Paris? Or the California University Weather Girl? Or on the Rose Parade Court?
Ugh. This show makes my head hurt. I’m off to have a Rum and Dr. Pepper.
Sweet Lord, But that shite was awful!!!!
Now, I like my octopus sliced thin, too, and I much like Donna am still shocked that I can’t talk on my phone on Rodeo–but I wasn’t feeling this episode.
Mood–frustrated.
Level–eleven.
I gotta go load up the car with Dr. Pepper so I can drive all the way to Arizona and not see my mom.
Really? Donna Martin graduated for this?!