Whenever I get really upset about just how crappy the new 90210 is, I think back that the original show wasn’t that fantastic in its first season either. Old school Beverly Hills 90210 was cheesy and corny and practically sponsored by Bongo Jeans, but it was earnest and sincere. Plus we got the genius sleepover episode, the mother/daughter fashion show/Jackie Taylor coke frenzy, and the Dylan and Brenda Spring Dance love fest. So actually, the original was ten times better and this new version just blows.
Let’s start with the totally lame bachelorette party/bridal shower/baby shower. Now, I can’t pretend that I when I was in high school I had friends that were ex-drug addicts engaged to be married. But even if I did, there was no way in hell that my mother would allow me to hold a party for said friend in my grandmother’s mansion. The whole concept of everyone being friends with Adriana just kills me. Sure, she’s a nice kid now, but she’s also sixteen, pregnant and a few months out of rehab. She’s the definition of “living life in the fast lane”. This is further illustrated by popping pills in Grandma’s bathroom. Honestly, are we sure she’s really not Jackie Taylor’s daughter?
More distressing than a fashion show featuring toilet paper wedding gowns is the fact that Naomi’s sister looks to be in her early 40′s. If I was just a casual viewer, I would simply think the powers that be recast the part of Naomi’s mother. Oddly enough, she’s my new favorite character. Maybe it’s because she gives off a Valerie Malone/Valerie’s friend Ginger vibe or the fact that she’s working the Jack McKay memorial “let’s hustle the trust fund of a loved one” scheme, but she’s a welcome relief from all the dolts this show usually features. Oh and she was totally scamming Mr. Matthews at Melrose Place. Who is she? Sydney?
“But I didn’t swallow the pills!”
Cue ShanDo pulling a hidden-in-denim-kitten-swap as she boards a Virgin Atlantic flight to London:
“I switched tha Baaaabies!!!!”
I can’t wait for the inevitable Jen/Naomi Marina del Rey “Take me out to the Ballgame” meltdown.
When I was still watching, one scene really kind of just opened up my eyes to the issues of 90210. One scene had the parents dorkily quote to the daughter about how no one puts Baby in the corner. She didn’t get it. All I could think is, the main audience of this show are the ones who do get that line but now they are made the supporting characters.